From LawGuru Sexual Harassment Law FAQs                                                        42

EXAMPLES OF SUBTLE HOMOPHOBIA, HETEROSEXISM, AND SEXISM

1. Assume everyone you meet is probably heterosexual.

2. Never say or have trouble saying the words ‘lesbian, gay, bisexual.

3. Begin sentences with “I’m straight but ...“

4. Think homosexuality is just a phase, a lifestyle, a choice, a preference.

5. Use the terms lesbian, gay, or bisexual (hereafter collectively known as LesBiGay) as accusatory.

6. Keep your distance from LesbiGays for fear of being labeled one yourself.

7. Are outspoken about LesBiGay rights, but make sure everyone knows you are straight.

8. When you hear the words lesbian or gay you immediately think of SEX and that sexuality is being ‘flaunted’. When you hear the words marriage, husband, or wife, you immediately think of LOVE or you don’t even notice that sexuality is being declared.

9. Don’t ask about your LesBiGay friends’ lovers/partners although you regularly ask about the wife/girlfriend or husband/boyfriend when you run into a heterosexual friend.

10. Tell or laugh at a homophobic joke so you don’t get called names or laughed at too.

11. Feel repulsed by stereotypical gay men and lesbians.

12. Don’t confront a homophobic remark for fear of being identified as a LesBiGay yourself.

13. Kiss an old friend, but are afraid to shake hands with, hug, or kiss a LesBiGay friend.

14. Feel repulsed by public displays of affection between lesbians or gay men, but accept the same affect ional displays between heterosexuals.

15. Assume that all lesbians are ‘butch’ and gay men are effeminate.

16. Feel that a lesbian is just a woman who can’t find a good man.

17. Stereotype lesbians as ‘man-haters’, separatists, or radicals. Use those terms accusingly.

18. Wonder which one is the ‘man’ in a lesbian couple and which one is the ‘woman in a gay male couple.

19. Feel that LesBiGays are too outspoken about gay rights.

20. Fail to be supportive when your LesBiGay friend is sad about a quarrel or breakup

21. Avoid mentioning to friends that you are involved with a women's organization because you are afraid they will think you are a lesbian.

22. Expect a lesbian to change her public identity or affect ional habits or mode of dress to work on feminist issues.

23. Change your seat in a meeting because a LesBiGay person sits in the chair next to yours.

24. Think that if a LesBiGay touches you they are making sexual advances.

25. Look at a lesbian or a gay man and automatically think of their sexuality rather than seeing them as whole, complete persons.